Oh baby, lay me down. I am weary. Oh baby, lay me down. The world is too full of pain. The world is too full of lost, confused, fighting, hating, lying human beings. How can you even know what’s right anymore? Are we worth saving – us humans? Are we even worth caring about when compared to the majesty of trees, rocks and streams?

Think how beautiful and quiet the world would be without us! Birds, water gurgling and crickets. Bees buzzing on lazy summer days. Grass blowing.

OH baby, lay me down, I am weary. It is time for sleep now, and I will become the wind, the air. I will rest lightly on the earth and enjoy the caresses of the grasses and the scrubbing of the evergreens. I will lie in the sun as I protect the earth. I will be an air poisonous to humans. I will suck the life from their lungs, gather them up in a fierce cosmic wind and throw them to the stars!

Writing from my belly.

This is something I’m going to start doing. Why? Because I hate my belly. Like my mom and her mom, I’m tall and thin, with a belly. Any weight I put in first goes to my stomach. So I end up thick through the middle with danglely arms and stick legs. An AT-AT walker kind of woman, except on two legs instead of four.

Can I learn to love my belly and love my mom and grandmom? The bit of revulsion I just felt as I typed that last sentence makes me think, probably not, on an emotional, easy to reach level. Can I learn to love my belly – my full, comforting belly filled with fuel and warming my body like a hearth?

There’s only been one thing I’ve ever been good at: failure. Oh sure, I’m good at “graphic design” and “writing” and “organizing” – but really, it always comes down to the same fucking thing: I have no staying power. Scratch that. It always comes down to the same fucking thing: programming.

“Do not challenge.”
“Follow the Rules.”
“Make yourself small so others look big.”

“Be good, but not too good.”

“Your reward is in the afterlife.”

So I fail over and over and over again. And other people look good. I, on the other hand, look… less and less like the wild horse everyone wants to tame.

So many plans, so little accomplishment. (God will save you.) So little will power. (God will save you.) Scratch that.

“Make yourself good, but not so good that others look bad.” (Whoops, you’re getting too good, better change focus.”)

Fashion - Male Fitting model required

We are looking for someone who can be our standard size in a line of male corsets. The approximate measurements we require are:

Chest = 38 inches
waist = 31 inches
hip = 33.5 inches (measured about 5 inches below the waist)

I have suffered for this..you gotta come see!
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