Category Quick Jump
The Sickness returns. Inertia. Do I go for a jog or bike to Donald’s at Hastings and Nanaimo, buy groceries and come back? Or just start working: attempt to get the last 4 hours in – scratch that – work on my client’s site so he’s happy with me?
I don’t want to work. Nor jog. Maybe I would have went to my friend’s media event, or even to a yoga class… Blaaaaaaaah. I wish I could stop existing. Yesterday was a perfect day; today, in contrast, is evil.
I can’t get off when I have sex. As I said to my bf, I don’t have the energy anymore, to go there. The neurons play around each other, but they don’t actually connect. Blaaaaaaaah. Old, worn out parts – a dying sexual self… Blunted, constant itch that won’t go away.
I’m unhappy because I have no will power. I get up in the morning, read my email, check Facebook, check my three Twitter accounts – post a notice for the conference I’m organizing - check my email again…
I think about all I have to do…
Work out, the dishes, bit of work for one client, bit of work for another…
Brush my teeth…
The brushing of the teeth is the killer, each morning and night – do you believe that a 45 year old woman has trouble getting up in the morning and going to bed at night because she hates brushing her teeth? It’s true.
Brushing teeth is boring. My life is filled with boring and no – IT IS NOT MY FAULT!!
What is my fault is not standing up for what I need: abandoning writing, abandoning photography, abandoning video-making…
Abandoning my siblings... I should not have shut down when I was eighteen. I should not have let my Mother kill my spirit. I should have continued to fight her.. But I was on the edge of sanity!
Links of Fondness :
Machine Biscuits :